“When you want to encourage a greater sense of responsibility in others (and yourself), emphasize the anticipation of accomplishment, not the penalties for failure.”    Roger Crawford

My eldest son,  Sean get in my car after I pick him up from school and tell me, “Dad, I got Top in my class for my English test.” this is the second time, he score the highest marks for his English test in class. He is determined, why, as Sean has set a goal to attend an international School after he finishes his primary. His mum and I told him that in order for him to enter this school,he need to be very strong in his English.

Sean is a smart boy and since we seldom pressure him for his school work, he take it easy but we knew if he put his mind to it, he can do it as in every one else. He seldom get scolded for failing his test, non of his brother or sister ever also. As Sean had set a goal for himself, he has put his sight onto achieving his goal. We had told him that excel in English alone is not good enough for him to get into the International School, he also need to be good in other subject too.

With a little encouragement and appreciation of his test even when he fail, with a tiny bit of warning if fail too often when he play too much, he knew what he need to do on the next test i.e. improve on the score.  As the quote say it all on the beginning of this blog.

“When you want to encourage a greater sense of responsibility in others (and yourself), emphasize the anticipation of accomplishment, not the penalties for failure.”    Roger Crawford

Sean wanted to model his elder sister who score 7A in her UPSR exam and receive many praises and envy. His sister Victoria is now in a Chinese medium School, a very small school with less than 200 students in the whole school and her class 23 students. Many of our friends and relatives are saying that we are taking a risk for sending a top grade student to an seemingly under performed school. Well, the main reason we send her to this school is that this school is a pilot school in our state to practices “Appreciative Learning.” where the teachers will look for good behaviors and conducts and praise the student for it even though they make mistakes. We can see the vast improvement in both our children conducts and behaviors, they are more assertive and enthusiastic about helping up in daily choir and housework.

I once heard and read about a news in Singapore that some parents are send their children to tuition school, nothing wrong about that, but when the child is only 1-3 years old, that’s  something you need to ponder. Why kill their childhood for they never get it  back again.

Create a good memory for them to cherish when they grow up.

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